Saturday, May 23, 2009

Lodge Dream

What a magical, beautiful moment. I don't quite know how to explain it, but I was laying in bed last night replaying the stressful events of the week. I knew sleep would not come to me quickly. I then began to think about the powers of healing, and wondered if it was all a bunch of b.s. My Reiki guide, Kristy, says it is all in the power of intent, and belief in yourself to do so. Not the belief that YOU are a "healer", but that you believe in drawing down the energy from a spirit source, then through you as the "host", and intending it to go to wherever you direct it. Even though I have been attuned to Reiki level 1 and 2, I have been feeling....not so healer-ific lately.

I laid there in bed, and began to drift off. I don't recall being fully asleep, but I must have been, because I started to see what I believe were Iroquois medicine men before me, but also women as well. It was a Lodge, a dirt floor lodge, it smelled of smoldering fire.. and they had me come in. There were no words spoken when a man opened my hand palm up and put a handful of dried powder in my hand. I don't know what the powder was, but it smelled of herbs and ash. He closed my hand and had me open it again...the powder was gone, but my palm had a mark or spot on the inside, much like an ash Wednesday sort of mark. I had no idea what this was supposed to mean. Next thing I know Luna was there in the Lodge, and I jolted "awake".

I wanted to go "back" but didn't know how. I wanted to finish the dream but I ended up falling back to sleep into nothingness.

I woke up this morning and had forgotten it, until my baby Sam started climbing onto the bed and I was playing baby games with him, the Lodge dream came back to my memory.

I'm thinking the thoughts of Reiki triggered the dream, you know how sometimes you dream about your last thoughts before drifting off. But part of me wonders if I was thinking of finding my spirit source. like Kristy had explained. And the Lodge of medicine men is perhaps my "energy" source?? What WAS the powder put into my hand??

Anyway, it was a beautiful thought, even if doesn't really mean anything in the end. It's hard for me to buy into much here lately, I am finding myself becoming cynical and untrusting and questioning a lot of things, mainly faith in myself. And then I have a dream like that. It confuses me all over again.